Being a parent that seeks to reduce the harm you cause to your children can often mean holding back, overthinking, hoping you didn't say the wrong thing, and feeling guilty about what you did say. 

What I have learned is that saying exactly what you want to say, when and how you want to say it is important information about what you are working with internally. 

So, come say it in a group of safe parents. Your only "job" is to notice your words just as they are. Nothing else!